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All 16 learnings · one per slide
Unf*ck
Yourself
Gary John Bishop, in bytes
16 key learnings on changing your self-talk through seven assertions, and getting out of your own way.
16 learnings · ~40 sec eachSwipe →
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Unf*ck Yourself, in bytes
16 key learnings from Gary John Bishop’s no-nonsense guide to getting out of your own head, built around seven assertions you can say to yourself. Each takes about 40 seconds to read. Swipe, use the arrows, or your keyboard.
Unf*ck
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Learning 1 · Introduction
Your Self-Talk Shapes Your Life
The idea
Bishop argues the conversation in your head drives how you act. Change what you tell yourself, and your actions change.
In real life
Someone who keeps saying “I'm bad at this” stops trying.
Takeaway
Listen to your inner voice, and change the script.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 2 · Introduction
You're Not Stuck, You're Choosing
The idea
Most of the time, we aren't trapped by circumstances but by habits of thinking we haven't questioned.
In real life
Staying in a job you dislike can be a choice made by default.
Takeaway
Question the stories that keep you where you are.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 3 · Introduction
Use Assertions, Not Affirmations
The idea
Bishop prefers assertions, active statements that require evidence and action, to affirmations that only sound positive.
In real life
“I am willing” invites action; “I am rich” may only invite wishful thinking.
Takeaway
Say things to yourself that lead to action.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 4 · Assertion 1
I Am Willing
The idea
Change starts with willingness, not certainty or motivation. Being willing to do what it takes, even uncomfortably, opens the door.
In real life
Being willing to have a hard conversation is the first step to having it.
Takeaway
Ask: am I willing? Then act.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 5 · Assertion 2
I Am Wired to Win
The idea
Bishop argues you're always “winning” at something, even if it's avoiding discomfort or proving you're not good enough.
In real life
Someone who procrastinates is winning at avoiding risk of failure.
Takeaway
Notice what you're unconsciously winning at, and redirect it.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 6 · Assertion 3
I Got This
The idea
You've survived every hard day so far. Trust that you can handle what comes, even if you don't know how yet.
In real life
Remembering past difficulties you overcame builds confidence for the next.
Takeaway
Remind yourself of what you've already handled.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 7 · Assertion 4
I Embrace the Uncertainty
The idea
Uncertainty is part of life. Seeking certainty before acting keeps you frozen.
In real life
Waiting for the perfect time to start a business means never starting.
Takeaway
Accept uncertainty, and act anyway.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 8 · Assertion 4
Uncertainty Is Opportunity
The idea
Not knowing what will happen also means the outcome isn't fixed; good things are possible too.
In real life
A new role feels risky, but it is also a chance to grow.
Takeaway
See the possibilities in the unknown.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 9 · Assertion 5
I Am Not My Thoughts
The idea
Thoughts come and go; you don't have to believe or obey them.
In real life
The thought “I'll fail” can be noticed and ignored.
Takeaway
Observe your thoughts without being ruled by them.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 10 · Assertion 5
I Am What I Do
The idea
You are defined by your actions, not your intentions or thoughts.
In real life
Planning to exercise doesn't make you fit; exercising does.
Takeaway
Judge yourself by actions, not intentions.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 11 · Assertion 6
I Am Relentless
The idea
Lasting change takes persistence. Keep going, especially when it's hard.
In real life
Most people quit just before the habit sticks.
Takeaway
Keep going past the point where others stop.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 12 · Assertion 6
Relentless Isn't Reckless
The idea
Being relentless means persisting with purpose, adjusting your approach while staying committed to the goal.
In real life
Changing tactics after setbacks while keeping the same goal.
Takeaway
Stay firm on the goal, flexible on the method.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 13 · Assertion 7
I Expect Nothing and Accept Everything
The idea
Expectations of how things or people should be cause frustration. Accepting reality as it is lets you respond effectively.
In real life
Expecting a colleague to change leads to disappointment; accepting them lets you work around it.
Takeaway
Drop rigid expectations, and deal with what is.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 14 · Assertion 7
Acceptance Isn't Resignation
The idea
Accepting what is doesn't mean giving up. It means starting from reality rather than wishing it were different.
In real life
Accepting a bad diagnosis can be the first step to treatment.
Takeaway
Accept the situation, then act to improve it.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 15 · Conclusion
Stop Waiting for Motivation
The idea
Motivation is unreliable. Bishop urges acting regardless of how you feel.
In real life
Getting up early even when you don't feel like it.
Takeaway
Act first; feelings often follow.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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Learning 16 · Conclusion
Get Out of Your Own Way
The idea
The biggest obstacle is usually you. Recognising your patterns is the first step to breaking them.
In real life
Noticing the excuses you repeat shows where you're holding yourself back.
Takeaway
Spot your own excuses, and stop accepting them.
Unf*ck Yourselfabhayjaiswal.com
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All 16 learnings complete
That’s all 16 learnings.
Your life follows your self-talk. Which assertion will you start saying to yourself today?
Abhay Kumar JaiswalFCA · PMP® · Workday Financeabhayjaiswal.com
Summaries in my own words. Read the book for the full stories.
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Summaries are written in my own words for learning. Read Unf*ck Yourself by Gary John Bishop (2016) for the full stories. More Books in Bytes